The expanse is self-inflicted
a self-exiled expatriate;
I am here, not there

answered a calling, have since done my
best at least pretty well considering
restraints with which I had to work

sometimes I feel
my work here done
my time here over
needed elsewhere,
so I try to believe

but the work here is far from finished
though I would prefer it be for me

there are times I think someone else
needs to take their turn at this thing
as I have been here, done that

God has yet to agree.

Life off the playground is not about
taking turns everybody does not get into
the game (their choice) so I keep working
at all of it, trying hard, doing what I can,
attempting to practice the patience I
once employed abundantly in tougher
times and situations

Awaiting God’s answers
to questions I am not sure
I know how to even ask
is my symbol to bear

In seeking clarity to a calling maybe I
need to be more specific in expressing
my tepidly unique, evolving, reservations

Mark Lucker

Vexing thesaurus

Forever is an ugly word

Inspiring, enticing, incorrigible
promise and implications immense
execution uncertain, incomplete

Forever is overly simplistic

hopeless realization intoxicates
a siren-like, self-coaxing impossibility
mocking, scornful of your naiveté

Forever is an ugly word

gracefully benign until practiced;
its only relationship to reality is its
ultimate, untimely, predictable demise